I was recently forced to re-evaluate a certain area of my life and it was quite uncomfortable. Everything I’d lined up to do made perfect sense and fit the mode of a well-crafted plan. Still, something wasn’t quite right.
So I quieted myself for a couple of days, went back to my prayer closet and discovered this: I was about to make a huge mistake. OUCH.
So much time and effort had been spent devising the “new thing” that it was starting to become apart of my normal world. How in the world was I going to gain back the lost time, investments, and the chunk of my heart that felt extremely disappointed? Would I ignore God’s prompting and pridefully keep going in the same direction? Or would I surrender and consider this fact: GOD sees the bigger picture.
It’s safe to say, I’m choosing the latter and not because I’m so strong. It’s because God is so powerful. His spirit is empowering me to put my cute and fancy planner down and truly consider that his view is different from mine. He sees the danger I would navigate. He sees the turmoil I would experience unnecessarily. Most importantly, he sees that his Glory will not be magnified through my unwise decision. My life is not my own. Things are truly about HIM!
Why is such a dependence okay? Because I have had first-hand experience of trying things in my own strength. And I can assure you I was like the ship without a sail, the car without a steering wheel, and the bike without handle bars. I think you get the picture. Lol.
I can laugh now, but I surely remember those times of my blatant disobedience and how hard it was to dig myself out of the pits I dug for myself. In fact, I would still be in those many pits if it had not been for God accepting my final words of surrender.
I’m thankful for the grace of God then and I’m surely thankful for his grace now as I weigh the matters of my own heart today.
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